Well, you all know how much I hate this kind of thing. However, Michael's list of confessions encouraged me to post my own. Make of it what you will.
I confess that theological systems and ideas that feel like they’re trying too hard (Dispensationalism, Just War Theory, Cessationism, Paedobaptism) should be dismissed with little effort.
I confess that though I appreciate his contribution and value his ideas, reading Colin Gunton has always been laborious to me. I find it difficult to justify boring theology and humourless theologians. We should probably begin a global movement of protest and boycott the old farts.
I confess that almost all Christian devotional material leaves me with chills down my spine, similar to reading a Jackie Collins novel involving Jesus Christ and me in a snog!
I confess, I am a recovering fundamentalist and shudder to think of some of the sexist, anti-intellectual and homophobic nonsense I’ve preached in the past. I now consider the equality of the sexes and inclusion of all people to be a gospel issue that I cannot remain silent on.
I confess I sometimes wonder if NT Wright would be taken more seriously if he wrote less simply. I once read a review by a Seminary professor who labeled him a 'populist' author!
I confess, I can't take seriously anyone who claims to have an interest in theology and can quote Rahner and spell Schleiermacher but hasn’t read John Howard Yoder.
I confess to being excited by Liberation Theology, intrigued by feminist theology, but disturbed by much Black theology.
I confess that I find the doctrines of inerrancy, Calvinistic predestination and the any-minute-rapture to be stupid. I really have a hard time respecting people who believe them.
I confess that, on the whole, I find heresy more exciting than orthodoxy.
I confess I think preaching monologue sermons is a monumental waste of time (for those on both sides of the pulpit) and actually harms the mission of the Church.
I confess that I don’t believe a small wafer and drop of Juice constitutes the Lord’s Supper. If you’re Eucharist isn’t in danger of making the mistakes Paul corrects in 1 Corinthians 10-11, then you’re clearly not celebrating the same!
I confess to be very judgemental of Christian leaders who consider Rick Warren to be ‘deep’ or Joyce Meyer to be a worthwhile investment of time. Seriously, if they can’t engage their minds, they shouldn’t engage their mouths!
I confess I’m not really bothered when, how or if Jesus will return. I would probably be a full preterist if it didn’t feel like guilt-ridden dispensationalism in reverse (along with charts and all!). Well, that’s if I could get around the small problem of the Resurrection and my aversion to floating around in a bodiless bliss!
I confess that I am more than willing to consider the possibility that God does not exist as a personal being. In fact, I suspect that using words like ‘exist’ and ‘being’ of God is to make a number of category mistakes. The only way I am really comfortable speaking in those terms is by employing the kind of metaphorical narratives that Jonathan Edwards used to argue for the trinity.
I confess I regret how much time I’ve spent reading academic impractical theology. Theology that is divorced from communal ethics should simply not be tolerated or accepted as theology.
I confess that I will never call another man (or, less likely, woman) “reverend”. In fact, I will silently judge you if you expect me to.
I confess that I wish it wasn’t fashionable to reject penal substitution and I’ve even re-considered the doctrine out of fear of people thinking I was jumping on a band-wagon! In reality, what I see people talking about are the mechanics of the Cross; there seems to be very little actual talk of atonement. We have confused debating the means with celebrating the end.
I confess Peace is at the heart of the gospel.
I confess that though I am inclusive in my theology, I am happy to be exclusive in my practice of church. Baptism saves, church is for believers, church discipline should be restored, etc. Churches are far too nervous of being judged by the world on such matters and I blame the Church Growth and Seeker-Sensitive Movements
I confess that I’ve never read much Luther and don’t intend to. I started ‘Bondage of the Will’ but put it down, tired of the boarish rhetoric. (Get it? Boarish? I kill me!)
I confess that, even though I am committed to urban living and even though I don’t approve of fishing, I can easily imagine retiring to a small cottage in the country and spending my days fishing in a river at the bottom of the garden.
Wow, it was good to get that off of my chest! So, what's my penance?!
Okay, this is probably cheating, but here's one more added as an appendix: I confess that I prefer Bloesch to Berkouwer and Grenz to Vanhoozer. (My goodness, Vanhoozer is so over-rated and matches Gunton in the boredom stakes! There is, of course, little logic in contrating Grenz and Vanhoozer, but I liked the sound of the two names in juxtaposition!)